Kiki's Corner

Hope in Her Happily Ever After

"I know what I am planning for you, says the Lord. I have good plans for you, not plans to hurt you. I will give you hope and a good future." Jeremiah 29:11 NCV

I told my mom yesterday morning that I just love it when the Lord is not silent. I know that He still works even in the midst of the silence, but there is so much comfort when He speaks. And wow is He speaking!

I explained in yesterday's post that I felt the Lord was encouraging my heart to hope again. Even if this becomes a new normal for our family, there is always hope...hope for the dreams we have for our daughter to be realized one day....hope for complete healing ....hope for the headache pain to go far, far away....

Imagine my surprise when a special card signed by "Someone who cares" arrived in my mailbox just a few hours later. The words read, "You are a daughter of the King, a holy princess, the bride of Christ! That means no matter what your story might be right now, the ending is still happily ever after!" And I cried. Thank you, Father for confirming in my heart, that I need to allow myself to hope again. Her future is in Your hands.

(Please visit here for more Word Filled Wednesday)

Doing the Shred

Good Morning!

May the favor of the Lord be yours this day! The Lord woke me up early this morning, we had some business to do. You see, yesterday was one of those days. During my off period, I filled in for a teacher whose son has the flu (speaking of flu-poor Rachel has had the flu for a week and we are praying that she can return to school today) and one of his students decided that he didn't really need to do what I asked him to do. Really? So, I asked him again and he retorted that I was being retarded (I really can't stand that flippant terminology). Seriously? Fine! Lunch detention for you little guy, in hopes that you can remember how to be respectful to a teacher in class. His behavior was inappropriate, but it still bothered me.

So, I woke up this morning needing to let off a little steam....and the Lord reminded me that I had purchased the 30 day shred 3 months ago. Oiy! I guess I just assumed that if I had the dvd in my possession, my body would shred itself in hopes that I wouldn't torture it by actually putting the dvd in the player. These may be the last words my shaking hands can type for a while. Ha! I haven't done push ups in years and girlfriend looked like it. I was excited about the floor exercises, because it was 5:15 am and it felt good to lay down....until the torture began! Oh my merciful heavens this is a workout...and I'm only on level 1.

After the shred, I pulled out my Esther workbook and began the study that I had hoped to do last spring. One of the first verses we were instructed to look up was Romans 15:4 that says, "For whatever was written in earlier times was written for our instruction, that through perseverance and the encouragement of the Scriptures we might have hope." I love this! The next question was, "Do you have any natural reason to think that whatever your "once upon a time" might have been, it can never be now?" Hello Beth, are you right here in this room with me? If you are, I really need to go put on some makeup and fix my hair, because I have just finished the first day of my 30 day shred and I look....well a bit of a shredded mess right now!

How timely is the Lord. Yes, I have started to wonder if our life right now is the new normal (yes, I know that normal is only a setting on the dryer). And then He reminds me early this morning that His words were written for our instruction and "that through perseverance and the encouragement of the Scriptures we might have hope." Ah, just what this heart of mine needs! What a mighty, mighty God we serve!

Crowder's How He Loves Us

Have you heard the David Crowder Band's new Cd?
Our favorite is, "How He Loves."
If you haven't heard it, please take a few minutes and listen to the powerful words....it is sure to bless.

Trusting and Waiting to See His Glory!

"But You, O LORD, are a shield about me, My glory, and the One who lifts my head." Psalm 3:3

Oh, I wanted to stay angry....embarrassingly, I thought it was my right. This is my daughter after all. But even after typing the previous post the Lord had already begun to work on my heart. I still don't understand it all....but I don't have to... because I know the One who does and I can trust Him.

We have said it all along that God may very well be setting the stage to show His glory in this....but last weekend I just couldn't see past the nose on my face. I was broken over the magnitude of it all.

We moms (and dads) feel like we have to fix it when our children are sick, or sad, or hurt, or upset, don't we? When they ache, oh how we ache too. Somehow I got caught up in trying to fix what I know I cannot fix and I lost sight that our Heavenly Father aches when we ache too. I got wrapped up in the enormity of having to make the decision for surgery and when would be the best time (is there ever a best time for surgery?) and so on and so on.

And then I became frustrated and angry, and in the middle of it all, the Lord encouraged me to trust Him once again. I found that child-like faith again. If the timing of the surgery is not His timing, then He will change it. If the procedure is not the right procedure for Rachel, then the Great Physician will see to it that other arrangements are made. If the plans that have been made are right and in Rachel's best interest, then the doors will remain open. There is much relief and peace in handing that all over to Him once again. He knows this heart of mine too well though. It is my nature to jump into action on behalf of my daughters...but I am reminded that He is not slow to action either and His was are always the best. I choose to trust Him.

I have talked about L.B. Cowman's devotional, "Streams in the Desert" so many times before but in my anger I missed a day. My mom lovingly called me the next day and asked if I had read it. She said that it should have been titled, "My Dear Kristi...."

I picked up the Word for September 20th and sobbed. Oh, how timely is the Lord!

I know that it is long, but if you would like to read it too, I will post it below. Thank you for your prayers and encouraging comments and cards. I am so blessed by all of you.

September 20, Streams in the Desert by L.B. Cowman

"Did I not tell you that if you believed, you would see the glory of God?" (John 11:40)

"Mary and Martha could not understand what their Lord was doing. Each of them had said to Him, "Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died." (vv.21, 32). And behind their words we seem to read their true thoughts: "Lord, we do not understand why you waited so long to come or how you could allow the man you love so much to die. We do not understand how you could allow such sorrow and suffering to devastate our lives, when Your presence might have stopped it all. Why didn't you come? Now it's too late, because Lazarus has been dead four days!" But Jesus simply had one great truth in answer to all of this. He said, in essence, "You may not understand, but I am telling you that if you believe, you will see."

Abraham could not understand why God would ask him to sacrifice his son, but he trusted Him. Then he saw the Lord's glory when the son he loved was restored to him. Moses could not understand why God would require him to stay forty years in the wilderness, but he also trusted Him. Then he saw when God called him to lead Israel from Egyptian bondage.

Joseph could not understand his brothers' cruelty toward him, the false testimony of a treacherous woman, or the long years of unjust imprisonment, but he trusted God and finally he saw His glory in it all. And Joseph's father, Jacob, could not understand how God's strange providence could allow Joseph to be taken from him. Yet later he saw the Lord's glory when he looked into the face of his son, who had become the governor for a great king and the person used to preserve his own life and the lives of an entire nation.

Perhaps ther is also something in your life causing you to question God. Do you find yourself saying, "I do not understand why God allowed my loved one to be taken. I do not understand why affliction has been permitted to strike me. I do not understand why the Lord has led me down these twisting paths. I do not understand why my own plans, which seemed so good, have been so disappointing. I do not understand why the blessings I so desperately need are so long in coming."

Dear friend, you do not have to understand all of God's ways of dealing with you. He does not expect you to understand them. You do not expect your children to understand everything you do--you simply want them to trust you. And someday you too will see the glory of God in the things you do not understand."

Isn't that an incredible devotion?! Yes, I can trust the One who lifts my head again so that I may watch and see His glory in this.

One more thing before I publish this post, this precious mom is heavy on my heart. I know many of you are praying for Andrew and Melanie. Please, continue to pray for them. She is asking the Lord for 100% healing for her son. Her constant devotion to her family and to her Lord are so evident in every post that she writes. If you haven't stopped by her blog, please do so today.

Taking a Break

Ya'll I'm going to take a little break from blogging. I adore each one of you precious friends and followers more than you know....so much so that I don't want you to have to have to see or experience the depths of my heart right now.

On our Lubbock trip last weekend we also came across a field of sunflowers that had already been sprayed so that the farmers could harvest the seeds and the fields looked so sad~in stark contrast to the beautiful, life-filled sunflower seeds we saw only a few feet before.

As we crossed the 3 month mark before surgery this last week, my heart became more anxious and then angry. I honestly don't understand it all nor do I like it one bit. Why my Rachel? Why now? I have loved the Lord and tried to serve Him faithfully since I was 7 years old so I need you to know that I have loved Him far too long to ever doubt His great and fierce love for me and my family or to ever doubt His great faithfulness....but I'm still hurting and feeling like these sad sunflowers:

Oh, I know He has not forgotten us nor is His arm too short to reach us. I believe in His all-sufficiency and I believe in His awesome sovereignty and He is mighty to save and so worthy of our best praise. I believe all of that whole-heartedly, but He and I have some things to work out in this heart of mine. So, I'll be taking a break from blogging.

Even in the pain of my heart He lovingly keeps reminding me that His mercies are new every morning and that He longs to show us great and mighty things that we don't know. My morning devotion was Psalm 121 that says, "I will lift up my eyes to the hills--from whence comes my help? My help comes from the Lord...." Even in our deepest sorrows, our pain, and our questions He still speaks, and He still cares, and He still loves, and He comes to our rescue.

Oh, He will lift my anxious heart and I will continue to praise Him....even in the sorrow....even in the midst of my daughter's pain....in the midst of my questions....in the midst of my anger... and I will rejoice again!

Standing in Awe of Him

"Let all the earth fear the LORD;

Let all the inhabitants of the world stand in awe of Him." Psalm 33:8.

Many of you know that I was born in Kansas. So, this Kansas girl adores sunflowers.

Last weekend was Hannah's first cross country meet and Mr. Incredible and I got up at the crack of dawn to make our way to her meet in Lubbock. On our way there, we came across the most glorious sunflower patches. Since it was still too dark outside, we decided that we would stop on the way home. I could hardly wait.

We did get a chance to stop and take pictures. As I snapped pictures to my heart's content, I noticed this lone sunflower stretching above the others (can you see it?) and I said, "Delight!" I knew this would perfect for my Word Filled Wednesday post.

I don't know about you, but I want to be like that sunflower, rising above it all to stand in awe of my Savior! Oh, He is so worthy of our best praise! Go ahead, stand up, you know you want to....stand in awe of Him today.

Please visit Critty Joy for more Word Filled Wednesdays.

Mom's Taco Casserole

I hadn't made Mom's Taco Casserole in years. So last month when I was re-organizing my recipes, I came across this one and resolved to make it soon.

It had been so long since I made this for my family, that they responded by asking me to make this new recipe again soon. Oiy!

I thought I would share the recipe with you. You need a 13x9 dish, 1 pound of ground beef, cream of chicken soup, rotel, Ranch style beans, cheddar cheese, and taco Doritos.